Dr. Darcy Smith on slipping for your girl’s companion… | GO Magazine

Dear Dr. Darcy:

My personal sweetheart’s companion has begun sending me effective text messages. As much as I know it’s incorrect, I can’t help responding returning to the girl. At first it seemed like innocent flirting, but i must admit that I’ve become keen on this lady. I am with my girl for 5 several months and now we’re about to go in with each other and I also’m starting to freak out over my thoughts for her companion. Can I delay the move?

Interesting time… appears like you are freaking around about significantly more than how you feel on her behalf companion. I’m gambling you’re freaking on about transferring together with your gf. We ponder the way you’ve handled responsibilities in earlier times. I really don’t have confidence in coincidences in most cases, and it’s really odd that although you’ve understood her companion for months, you recognize you have feelings on her in the same manner you are going to cohabitate along with your girl. There isn’t any such thing as «innocent flirting,» particularly together with your girlfriend’s best friend. A few things are merely off-limits: the lady feminine family members (in fact, all relatives), the lady intern, the woman roomie, etc. You will find sufficient ladies to flirt with—stay from those in the woman world. It’s bad sufficient that you are most likely sabotaging your own union with your girlfriend. Never take down her closest friend too.

My dyke girl will not become adults and dress/act like a grownup. She is nearly twenty five years outdated nevertheless wears androgynous-looking clothes and is also constantly seen erroneously as a boy. I’ve a big issue with this because I do not want to be mistaken for staying in a straight union but also, Really don’t want individuals to think i am a pedophile!

I am not a large follower associated with girlfriend make-over. If you ask me, it really is a recipe for resentment and damage thoughts. It sounds just like your gf was that way when you found the lady and you met with the hope that she would—I really don’t know—grow from the jawhorse? Is it something she needs to expand away from? Existence might possibly be far more easy if we could all understand that that which we see is exactly what we get. If you like a project, focus your power elsewhere. There is a lot of work to perform within neighborhood. Leave the makeovers for reality tv. At the least those members tend to be ready.

E-mail questions to dr.darcysmith@gmail.com or contact 212-604-0144

*By posting questions, the writer acknowledges that she has no rights of confidentiality and this the woman question or a version thereof might be imprinted in GO mag. Communication between Dr. Darcy Smith and an author cannot constitute a therapeutic relationship and such a relationship and also the rights/privileges of such can just only end up being set up through a scheduled, in-person program.